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Question
I'm a gay and my parents told me that like hell you're gona be like that!! And once they found out that I had a girlfriend they told me I could no longer see or talk to her anymore or there will be serious consequences! We really care about each other and want to be together regardless of what my parents say.So we're still together and I want my parents to just except me for who I am! Should I tell my parents or should I wait until I move out of the house?

PFLAG's Answer
It seems like your parents are having difficulties accepting that their daughter is gay. If they found out by accident, it might make them less receptive to the idea. It is normal for parents to go through phases of denial, grief, shock. You might want to consider having an 'official' coming out talk. By being upfront and opening up the communication channels, you're giving them a chance to express themselves in a more controlled environment where you can converse with each other instead of argue. Remind them you love them, that you're the same person you were before, and that you just want to be honest with them. But coming out to your parents if you think they may not be supportive is something you should think carefully about. Are you financially dependent on them? If you are underage, is there someone in your family or a close friend you can talk to or even stay with if your parents should ask you to leave? If you do come out, have a support system in place, and remember to Stay Close. Assure your parents that you love them and understand that they may need time to adjust to this new information. If you can bring them to a PFLAG meeting in your area, that could be an enormous help. Find a chapter near you by going to www.pflag.org, Find A Chapter. As your parents become more accepting, introduce them to your girlfriend and try to spend quality time together so that they learn to appreciate her as a real person and ultimately recognize your relationship.

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